Receipt Art: February 25, 2012

This is Montana and Montana can be cold as shit - though this winter has actually been unseasonably warm for the most part.  Even the owls need to bundle up and get out the scarves and earmuffs.  Ok, so I'm actually full of shit.  Owls are animals and animals suck it up and deal with things like weather.  Luckily, receipt art owls do whatever I want them to do.  That's how all this happened.

Yup, I think he's pretty adorable.  The only part I don't find so adorable is the fact that his scarf is blowing the opposite direction of my cute wind swirlies.  Must be one of those fake wire situations like they did with the flag that's on the moon.  Whatever.

  

Receipt Art: Because I Got Called Out

Because I love my readers, when Confessions of A Hairdresser from Hair Raising Hell said the following in response to my last post I couldn't just ignore that shit: 

I, personally, happen to be hoping for the return of a receipt art from hiatus. Receipt art is one of my few simple pleasures that I look forward to on the internet.  

I hope for something with a palm tree, and perhaps a sexy Hawaiin lady or two. Something to beat the winter blues...

So here you go, Hairdresser.  I missed the palm tree, but I nailed the crap out of that sexy Hawaiian hula lady.  In fact I think she's pretty damn adorable.

She'll hula right into your heart.

So thank you for inspiring me to be more awesome.  I owe ya one.

Receipt Art: July 10, 2011

Even owls need fabulous vacays that involve extra large, extra cold, extra alcoholic drinks now and again.

That is one seriously relaxed owl there.  Please note his incredible casual posture and "I'm cool as an effing cucumber" demeanor.  I'm pretty much in love with the way he is reclining back on his little wing.  What a badass.

If you're a true receipt art aficionado, you may have noted the return of the crab there on the bottom.  Yup, he's shown up on a receipt before.  Forgive me for recycling now and again. 

Receipt Art: May 22, 2011

This receipt art is pretty self-explanatory.  Having a table with a father and his little boy, I figured a fire breathing dragon would go over pretty well.  I was also planning to add a knight or something to slay the dragon, but I clearly ran out of room.  So now that poor tower is totally undefended.  My bad.

Now if only I hadn't given that rather cute dragon such a horrible tail.

Receipt Art: May 9, 2011

Per my promise of posting receipt arts more regularly once again, I am sharing another artwork today.  My dedication to this mission is surprising even to myself.  I'm hoping I can parlay this power of will to finally putting all my laundry away.  Doubt it.

I'm going to just say outright that this one needs a bit more detail; it's cute, but it just doesn't quite have enough for me.  I'm also going to go ahead and point out the dinosaur sized, totally unrealistic bee I drew.  That thing has to be at least the size of a minivan.

Receipt Art: May 6, 2011

Recently I've been adding mountains to a lot of my receipts regardless of the picture in the foreground.  I think it adds depth to my scenes.  Plus I like to draw mountains for some reason.  Something about how linear I do them just makes me happy.  Feel free to think I'm weird.

I present two of my receipt arts from Friday that both include mountains, but very different overall feels.  The first is a golf scene for a group who braved the light drizzle to hit the links.  I used artistic license and went with sun instead.

I'm in love with how cute that golf bag turned out.

I also added my mountains to a typical spring theme of a mama duck and her babies complete with cattails. 

Here you might notice that below mama duck my table drew a little parachuting stick man.  The group - who eat at Hooters fairly regularly - work at the Smokejumper Center here in town.  Why I've never thought to draw them smokejumpers is beyond me.  That would make sense.

Receipt Art: May 1, 2011

Remember how I used to draw on receipts all the time?  Well believe it or not I still do that on each and every receipt I print.  I just don't bring my phone to work anymore - because I try to be a good employee now and again - which is how I captured all those drawings.  The loss of my one source of immediate documentation has clearly reeked havoc on my posting of receipts.  Today I decided to attempt to remedy this lack of receipt artworks by actually bringing one home and posting it.  I'm going to do my best to keep this over achieving up.

So here it is.  My first receipt art post since December.

Isn't that little crab freaking adorable?!  I think I love him.  I also love the fact that I was able to sell a hot chocolate to a lady eating a blackened mahi sandwich.  Fish and chocolate.  I even impress myself sometimes.

Receipt Art: December 9, 2010

As promised, I am doing my very best to avoid drawing anymore snowmen on my receipts.  I won't lie, it's been a challenge.  It seems the more I try to avoid snowmen, the more I think about them.  It's sort of freaky in a "the snowmen are going to come out of my dreams and kill me in overly dramatic teen scream movie" sort of way.  You know what I mean.

So here's one of my favorite snowman-free themes.

Yes, I used COLORS and made some festive holiday lights.  Simple but awesome.  I even managed to included both the female and male ends of the lights.  That's how freaking smart I am.

I also hope you noticed the sauce stains my customers' greasy little fingers left all over the receipt.  I think it really says "Hooters."

Receipt Art: Receipt-A-Palooza

You probably thought I had given up on making receipt arts.  Really the only thing that I've had to give up was my cellphone at work.  Ever since the major crackdown on phones in the building, I've been doing an awful lot of hoarding of receipts with no immediate way to photograph them.  So the receipts have been building up.  I apologize for being a hoarder.  Feel free to submit me to A&E or TLC for a major intervention.

Welcome to Receipt-A-Palooza!

I take you back to November 13, 2010.  That's how effing long I've been holding on to this thing.  Either I really like you guys or I'm completely and utterly insane.

This was mad for a band and it's an awesomely abstract little number.  I love the way it turned out almost as much as I love the fact that they had nine well vodkas accompanied by various mixers.  Just don't ask me why the computer decided to split up all those vodkas like that.  Technology is stupid.  And sober.

Now that winter is upon us, I have a whole new season of awesome to explore.  Of course by explore I mean that so far I've just drawn a shit ton of snowmen.  This was attempt one.  Please note how into the snowflakes I was.  Also note that I gave that poor snowfellow only two fingers.  My bad.

 Next the snowman went skiing.  I imagine him to be a lot like the Roaming Gnome as explores our wide and wondrous world.  Here he has decided to roam right into the path of oncoming skier.  Stupid snowman.  At least he got three fingers per hand.

Next is my favorite of the bunch.  There is just something I love about this little owls.  My love is only deepened by the little scarf and earmuffs.  Stay warm my little dudes.

Oh and perhaps you've noted how my snowflakes have now turned to asterisks because everyone knows that is the universal doodle for snow.  Whatever.

Yup, there's the snowman outside of a warm little home polluting the world with choking smoke from a coal stove.  Happy Holidays!

Then I finally got over the the snowman and changed him to a nondenominational holiday tree accompanied by a happy, hat-wearing moon.

I know make you two promises.

1. No more snowmen
2. Less receipt hoarding

Yeah, I can manage all that.

Receipt Art: October 30, 2010

I decided to clean out my pouch today at work.  Waiting pouches and aprons just seem to collect things and everyone once and while it just feels right to get all that shit out of there.  Not only did I find several dollars I didn't know I had - score - but I also found an amazing receipt art that I had totally forgotten about.  I'm going to go ahead and say now that this is the type of receipt art I would only give to specific people; it's specialized and certainly not for everyone.  I'll go ahead and let you figure out why.

Yes, this is exactly the right sort of receipt art for a group of gentleman that order nine Big Daddies, a Bud Light Pint and a double whiskey coke.  Not only are those probably the cutest ghosts I've ever drawn (no offense previous ghosts), but they also are enjoying some delicious libations.  I am especially a fan of the ghost flying while drinking.  I'm not sure on the rules of ghost intoxication, but that might not be allowed.  Sort of like a DUI.  I guess that would be an FUI - Floating/Flying Under the Influence.  Even I'm ashamed how lame that just was.

Receipt Art: October 28, 2010

All this talk of Halloween cliches made me realize we all missed two major ones: ghosts and graveyards.  So what did I do?  I got all awesome and combined the two.  I suppose you do need graveyards to have ghosts after all.  Please enjoy.

It has come to my attention that none of my Halloween characters are very scary.  They most certainly are freaking adorable though.  This is easily my favorite Halloween receipt yet and I'd even go so far as to say it might be top five all time.  ALL EFFING TIME.  That's how much I love those little ghosts.  Is it possible to cuddle a spirit?

In addition to my receipt wonder, I am proud to announce that my crazy receipt drawings have finally inspired one of my trainees.  You see I always show my trainees my way of receipt personalization as well as what other girls do.  Most probably think I'm insane and then go ahead and just circle every possible thing with hearts and sign the bottom with a quick thank you like everyone else does.  It's cool, I understand that I'm a freak.

Then, in the trash, I found this (don't worry, it was gently laying on the top).  Yes, a trainee has made her own receipt masterpiece.  It may not be the most amazing thing ever, but that's not the damn point.  The point is she took the time to make it one of kind.  I am such a proud Mama Hoot.  My crazy is wearing off.

Receipt Art: October 21, 2010

Since it's getting closer and closer to Halloween my receipt arts have been getting all kind of spookified (yes, I know that's not a real word).  Now I could just draw the same pumpkins and whatnot over and over again but I would get entirely bored with myself.  So I decided to take a few suggestions from my blog readers and ended up drawing a spider theme for J. Franklin Evens.  It was fairly legit.

And then, there in the comments, it was pointed out that I neglected to include the cliche black cat in my over-the-top, super-Halloween receipt.  Mira-Cole pointed out, "You seem to also have forgotten the black cat chiche. Or even better, a black car sticking it's head out of a pumpkin. Double Halloween goodness, fear it."  First off, you're right, Mira-Cole.  Second, your last sentence makes me fell all sorts of happy; it practically reeks of me.


So here it is, Mira-Cole, in all its glory.  I thank you.

Check that shit out while ignoring my not so photogenic carpet.  Yes, that is a rather nonscary cat poking out of that pumpkin.  I think what he lacks in the ability to induce fear he more than makes up for in cuteness.  Just look at those little paws and pumpkin top turned hat.  Clearly adorable.


Please feel free to ignore my horrid attempt at a spooky tree.  It looks a lot more like a deformed witch hand than any tree I've ever seen.  It just looks so very sad.  Scary trees are clearly not my forte. 


And yes, I included that spider again for you, J. Franklin Evens.  Consider it a blog-insider thing.  


I also got a nice little note on one of my napkins from two music teachers in town for a convention.  Naturally I had been all fancy and drawn a pretty sweet music themed receipt with notes and instruments and treble clefs and whatnot. 

Unfortunately for you, they took it with them which happens to so many of my best artworks.  Just imagine all the wonders you'll never get the chance to see.

Receipt Art: October 17, 2010

Today I present you with my first ever receipt art inspired by a reader of "Girl and Guitar."  In response to my receipt featuring a plethora of  Halloween cliches, J. Franklin Evans rightfully said, "Hey!  All this time I thought something was missing from your pic and I just figured it out.  Shouldn't there be a spider somewhere? Hanging from a web or something? Yeah, cliche . . ."


Yes, Mr. Evans had totally called me out and I clearly couldn't let that go unanswered.  So here, Mr. Evans, is your spider inspired theme.

It's a fairly simple design, but I think it's awfully cute.  Mostly this is because the spider is smiling.  Are spiders happy creatures?  I clearly think yes.  Also, note that spiders have eight legs.  When I left this receipt, the recipient was adamant that spiders have six legs.  No, dude, this is Earth and on Earth our spiders do indeed have eight legs.  Wikipedia that shit.


Anyway, I'm liking this whole blog readers inspiring me thing, so please feel free to leave you deepest receipt desires in my comments.  I'll try my darnedest to bring your ideas (well the good ones at least) to a receipt near you!

Receipt Art: October 13, 2010

It's that time of year when people start to get all cliche and celebrate the harvest and Fall and paganism.  Of course most of us don't know a think about the harvest and most certainly are not pagans.  I'll give us all Fall though, except for people in Hawaii.  And those south of the Equator.  You get Spring instead (and no, I'm not saying Hawaii gets Spring).

Naturally, I jumped on this Fallalicious bandwagon and let the season inspire one of my receipts.  Of course by inspire I actually mean that I tried to put just about every cliche thing I could think of on this receipt in the 45 seconds I had to draw it.  I clearly went to town.

Note the pumpkin, jack-o-lanterns, bat, witch, and feeble attempt at cornstalks.  Also observe the moon with spooky clouds rolling in.  Maybe you noticed the scientifically inaccurate cloud floating behind the moon.  I drew the moon first.  So I bent scientific law to increase my stereotypical spook factor.  I'm an artist and I do what I want.

And of course I self-promoted my costume contest.  I have a BS in Marketing.  Forgive me if I try to use now and again - even if I'm doing it half-assed.  On that note, CLICK HERE AND VOTE FOR ME ON THE DAILY!

Happy Fall, lovies!

Receipt Art: October 10, 2010

For the record, I don't think Hooters wings are that hot.  This is not because they aren't hot, it's because I have the amazing ability to handle spice like a champ.  I think this is my superpower; it's clearly a gift.  Of course not everyone is like me.  Most people probably can't handle the level of spiciness I tend to enjoy.   These people think Hooters has hot wings.  It's all good, I don't think less of you.

One man in particular comes in every Sunday with his wife to have a plate of 10, naked, 911 wings.  He sweats and guzzles beer and spends the whole time he's there looking like he is in the most intense, wing-induced pain of his life.  Yet, there he is every Sunday, sitting at the same table, eating the same hot wings.

When he orders his wings however, he doesn't ask for them in the usual way.  That would make sense.  Instead, he asks for ten "stupid hot" wings.  Maybe he's from Boston, I don't know.  But that's beside the point.  I of course had to reflect his love for stupid hot wings in a receipt art.  It only seemed right.

Note the pepper.  He is "stupid hot."  This is made obvious by his self-declaration of heat and red coloring; everyone knows red is directly proportional to hotness.  Luckily, that Big Daddy beer is here to keep us "stupid cool."  And of course they're all freaking ecstatic about their stupid states of being.

I'm clearly stupid awesome.

Receipt Art: October 2, 2010

After that little happy thought upon happy thought of a post I think I need a little receipt art to brighten my day.  Yup, that and some delicious ice cream seems to be just what this Hooters Girl needs!

I'm not sure there's much to say about this little masterpiece.  It's very Hooterlicious.  And for some reason I think those shorts are really cute.  Even the camel toe.

Receipt Art: September 29, 2010

Today two of my regulars let me know they were thinking about buying a new "toy."  Being that they are twenty-something dudes I pretty much assumed it was a Jeep, a motorcycle, a snowmobile, a large TV, or kegorator.  I was right on the Jeep.  Naturally the Jeep was just begging for a receipt art.

I'm pretty proud of this one.  Mostly this is because for guessing and making shit up I think that Jeep turned out pretty damn well.  I mean you can totally tell it's a Jeep because it has that distinctive grill and headlights.  Yeah, I'm talking out my ass right now.

Oh and I'm trying a few new effects to make the receipt art standout a little more from the beers and hamburgers and fries.  Bear with me on that.

Receipt Art: September 21, 2010

This receipt art is really simple, but I think that's what I like about it.  I also like that I took my ass to Staples and bought a multi-colored pack of Sharpie Pens.  Thanks for being my newest addiction; right after Facebook, string cheese and kissing Dreamy.

Just look at the colorful, peaceful little scene.  Mmmm, Sharpie Pens.

Receipt Art: September 15, 2010

I find it mildly ironic that I've managed to do receipt artworks for months upon months and I've never featured an owl.  You'd think that working at Hooters I would have drawn an owl first or second or maybe third if I had really ideas for the first two.  But nope, I just drew my very first little owl today.  I have to say I think I like him.

And not only is he cute, but he's friendly too!  Hoo, hoo!  Thank hoo!

Yeah, sometimes I do make even myself sick with how lamely corny I can be.

Receipt Art: September 12, 2010

I love football.  I love college football.  I love University of Montana college football.  But more than I love Griz football (which is a whole hell of a lot), I love our mascot, Monte.  Monte is quite possibly the most legit mascot ever.  He breakdances, crowd-surfs, streaks, rides horses, hits goal posts at a full sprint, enters the stadium on a Harley and does a million other amazing things that take him from regular mascot lame to totally freaking awesome. I mean one of our past Monte performers is now Benny the Bull.  As in Benny the Bull of the Chicago Bulls.  That's just a sampling of how utterly legitimate Monte is.  I adore him.

Clearly I had to dedicate a receipt art to my beloved little Monte.  It's a decent first attempt.  And yes I know he has a weird leg deformity of some sort going on.  It's ok, I still accept him.

I apologize for the fact that I was apparently drunk when I took the picture causing the strange left side blur..  Unfortunately I was at work when I took it which means the I wasn't apparently drunk.  I was ridiculously sober.  I guess I just suck at taking pictures.  Note to self, photography is not a future career path.

Oh and the Griz lost.  To Cal Poly.  Dear University of Montana, welcome to no longer being #1 in the nation.  Sad face.  Then again if you didn't play like douches you'd still be on top.  I take back my sad face.  Reality says hello!

More important than that crap, Monte is nominated for the Capital One Mascot of the Year.  Again.  He's won twice.  Please go to Capitalonebowl.com and vote for him.  Love you long time.