25 February 2010

The Return of Nylon Man

Way back when in September, I had my creepiest, weirdest, most unbelievable Hooters customer ever.  He loved model trains and had jacked up, maybe fake, maybe real teeth and the advanced security of a belt/suspenders combo.  Mostly he was odd because he wore - and evidently looked really hot in according to him - male nylons which he called the perfect strip club attire.  He even gave me a card so I could check out the awesome myself.  I basically spent the whole time trying to not simultaneously laugh and vomit all over him.  If you missed this adventure, I highly suggest you visit it HERE.

Here we are nearly six months later and nylon man has returned.  Unfortunately, I didn't have the extreme pleasure of waiting on him.  You see I was too busy doing other things like running my car into ditches and stuff.  Damn.  But lucky for me (and you) my most favorite customer made sure to creep out his newest Hooters Girl by constantly asking about me and talking about me in the weirdest manner possible.  After severely creeping the shit of yet another Hooters Girl, the manager went over to catch it all for herself.  Evidently the conversation went a little something like this:

Manager: "So how was your meal this afternoon?"

Nylon Man: "Simply scrumptious.  Was missing a little extra Sauce though if you know what I mean."

Manager:  "Yeah, she has the day off today.  We can't make them work everyday!"

Nylon Man:  "Yes, I was told that, but I'm not sure I believe it.  I can feel she's here."

Manager:  "Well last I checked she wasn't.  Sorry to disappoint you."

Nylon Man:  "In that case, give her this note when she comes out of hiding."  I hear this was followed by a strange attempt at winking.

After returning to work a few days later I was handed the note at jumpstart.  I couldn't help but laugh out loud when I read it.  I now present it here unedited (including his own cross-outs) for you.

Sawuse,
I stopped by to get
an idea some info on a patent.  Hah lawyer joke.  I just got back from Spokane at a model RR show.
I thought I'd say high.  I was the one who gave you the business card on www.comfilon.com.  I still wear my nylons if you were curious.
Give me a call if you want to talk about it sometime (phone number).
Rod (name changed)

WTF.

4 comments:

  1. Wow, this guy sounds like a total headcase. I read the original post about him and couldn't believe some of the stuff he said to you. Does he pull the same schtick with your coworkers?

    At least Hans sounds like he's a genuinely nice guy, even if his quest to become your sugar daddy is somewhat disturbing. Mr. suspenders-and-nylons man, OTOH, sounds like a creep.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Um, wow...
    I truly hope he does not return to your store...especially not while you're there. The first incident with him was creepy enough, but, wow...he is beyond strange....he's creepy in a scary sort of way. Take care.

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