Random Searches

Every now and again I check my analytics because I get some weird kick out of seeing how many people are reading my blog. I also enjoy seeing how people got here. The paths are varied: site referrals, links and my very favorite, searches. Looking at random Google search terms, I am amazed at some of things people come up with to find information.

"Girl with one leg Ihop"
The joke is as follows: If a girl with big boobs works at Hooters, than were does a girl with one leg work? Ihop. I can't believe you had a need to look that up, ever.

"Hooters 'smidge mean'"
Newsflash, it's not just Hooters girls that are a 'smidge mean,' all chicks are a smidge mean. It has something to do with having a vagina. Concentrate lots of good lookingish girls in one restaurant and that whole smidge thing may just get thrown out the window at times.

"Hooters cameltoe"
Cameltoe happens, end of story.

"Cheer car wash jailbait"
Shame on you for looking that up. Actually, shame on high school cheerleaders for looking like little sluts on street corners.

"Hooters sidework"
Contrary to popular belief there is sidework at Hooters. I may not roll silverware, but I wash dishes, sweep the floors, bus my own tables, dust random crap and do whatever else I'm told to do. While some Hooters may be sidework free, remember that Hooters is franchised so every restaurant is not the same.

"Hooters in shiny legs"
Thanks for adding the word 'in' here; it was completely unnecessary. Yes, I get into my shiny legs everyday and skip on down to Hooters. Putting those legs on is really tricky stuff.

"My boyfriend in nylons"
Word to the wise, honey. If your boyfriend is wearing nylons he probably shouldn't be your boyfriend anymore. However, he could be your girlfriend if you're into that sort of thing.

Finally, my personal favorite...
"How to frost a tit boob cake"
First off, I am a fan of your redundancy; in case you didn't know tit and boob are synonyms for future reference. Next, kudos for making a 'tit boob' cake. Finally, I will suggest fondant for that realistic tit skin look. If you prefer the goodness of frosting, I guess you'd just start at the nipple and work your way out. I am no tit boob cake expert here, but I am an expert in awesome and you, my friend, are awesome