It's competition time at Hooters. To the general populace this is more commonly known as "the holidays." Of course those of us who work in any type of retail environment know that it's not so much of time of family gatherings as it's a time of selling the shit right out of stuff. Allow me to elaborate.
During the month of December, Hooters wants me and every other Hooters Girl to sell as many "souvenirs" as we can. Obviously, we are always expected to sell stuff, but during the holidays the expectation rises exponentially. Ideally, I am meant to mention merchandise at every table and generally I do; my sales numbers are always pretty high. Other girls struggle with the whole sales part of the Hooters Girl job. Usually this is met with a not so serious warning. But this is competition time and things have changed.
As a way to increase December sales, Hooters always holds some sort of competition in which the top seller receives a prize. Last year the first girl to reach $750 in merchandise and gift card sales received 50% off any merchandise purchases for an entire day for "Christmas shopping." Um, I work at Hooters. I don't want to be constantly reminded of that by buying all my family Hooters shit. Besides that hardly seems thoughtful. And don't even get me started on the fact that it was just an opportunity for Hooters to make more money. Whatever. I won the contest with a nearly $200 lead. Only all I wanted was a sweatshirt so they just gave me one. So I made them bunches of money and I got a sweatshirt. Go me?
This year, however, Hooters really stepped up their game and are giving away a freaking trip to Vegas. Now when I say trip to Vegas I mean they are giving a two-night stay at Hooters Hotel (which they get for free) and $100 toward a plane ticket. So basically they are giving away $100 when it's all said and done. But that's not the effing point. The effing point is that I am the most competitive person in the world and I WILL win. And then I will go to Vegas and be utterly fabulous.
Day one of the contest I was the leading seller with $150 in sales. Go me indeed. Then I had two days off and now I have no idea what's going on and who has sold what. All I know is that tomorrow it is so freaking on. And to that man who said I was the best salesperson he'd ever seen, thank you for realizing my supreme level of awesome. And for buying two shirts you didn't even know you wanted.
So who wants to drive to Missoula and do a little Christmas shopping?